Beck/Smith Hollywood

Joel McHale NBC photo

Funny man Joel McHale shrugs off the flurry of headlines that hit the internet after he was quoted saying he’s not allowed to talk about the Kardashians on his E! “The Soup.” 

“That was a misquote.  I make fun of the Kardashians every week, people can tell you.  What I can’t do,” he stresses, “is say anything about their sex tape.  That is the thing I’m not really supposed to talk about or make fun of.”

If ever you’re not sure whether McHale is joking, remember, the smart money is on the side of yes, he is.

But he’s serious when he says he’s grateful that his NBC “Community” is coming back for a third season Sept. 22.  New network chieftain Robert Greenblatt “was instrumental in that, and God bless the man.  We’re so happy to be back.”  Still, the show is in one of the most hotly-contested timeslots on the fall schedule, Thursday nights oppose Simon Cowell’s new “X Factor” on Fox, the “Charlie’s Angels” reboot on ABC — plus “The Big Bang Theory” on CBS and “Vampire Diaries” on the CW.  McHale is also serious when he says he hopes they keep their viewership.

The DVD release of Season 2 this coming Tuesday (9/6) might help that along.  It contains such critics’ and audience favorites of the inventive, off-beat comedy as the zombie Halloween episode, the all-stop-animation Christmas episode, and the two-part “A Fistful of Paintballs” and “For a Few Paintballs More.”

According to McHale, the show is already in production on its fifth episode for the new season.  So he can assure us, “There’s gunplay, there’s fire, there’s live animals — all kinds of crazy stuff is happening” for viewers to look forward to.    

He hasn’t had any scenes with “Community’s” latest high-profile new teacher, John Goodman, so far — but he’s enough of a fan that he’s been standing by setside to watch the star of stage, screen and “Roseanne” fame at work.

“He’s great.  He’s playing the Vice Dean of the Air Conditioning Repair School,” reports McHale.  “It turns out there’s this whole other part of the school we didn’t know about that’s the only profitable part of the school.”

Also new to the zany community college at the heart of the comedy is “The Wire’s” Omar Williams.  “He’s the new biology teacher” — who has a criminal background.

Bob Harper NBC photo

Trainer Bob Harper tells us that although Jillian Michaels left “The Biggest Loser” after last season, her spirit lives on, in a way.  “I’ve gotten possessed by Jillian a lot,” he jokingly admits.  “You’re going to see me in a different way, not taking ‘no’ for an answer, getting people to stand on their own two feet.”

 The beloved Bob, who has been known to shed a tear and share a hug with an emotional contestant every few episodes, has never been easy on his subjects.  But he’s even tougher these days, to hear him tell it.  He says, “Now that Jillian has moved on and is working with ‘The Doctors,” I’m getting a chance to spread my wings in my own way.  I’ve got to do what I can for these people, as passionately as possible.” 

Anna Kournikova NBC photo by Chris Haston

According to Bob, his new, high-profile fellow trainer — tennis star Anna Kournikova — is bringing plenty of passion to the show.  “She’s a sweet woman and a really strong competitor,” he says.  However, he points out that she is brand-new to the game of helping morbidly obese people get into shape.  “It’s going to be a real struggle, I think, because it’s such a specific job.  You can come in with all the heart you want, but you also have to know what to do.”  Trainer Dolvett Quince is also newly aboard “The Biggest Loser,” which launches its Season 12 on Sept. 20.

His friendship with Jillian continues.  “Of course!” he says.  “We talk all the time.  I’m about to leave for dinner with her right now.”

Janet Jackson will not be involved in the Oct. 8 tribute concert to her late brother, Michael Jackson, in Cardiff, Wales due to the schedule conflicting with the trial of Dr. Conrad Murray, who is accused of manslaughter in causing Michael’s death.   She has issued a statement making it official:  ”Because of the trial, the timing of this tribute to our brother would be too difficult for me.”

Rachael Carpani Lifetime photo

“Against the Wall” star Rachael Carpani is looking forward to catching up on some sleep – now that the first 13 episodes of her Lifetime police drama are almost a wrap.

 “There’ve been a few times I’ve wanted to hit Snooze again on the alarm — I’m not a morning person.  In fact, I have done that and I’ve gotten into trouble,” claims the Aussie actress with a laugh.  Seriously, adds Carpani, “We were just saying the other day how sad it’s going to be not to see each other for awhile.  It’s a fun set, the kind where you find yourself doubling over laughing at midnight.  We were so lucky.  I didn’t meet anybody until we shot the pilot, and then we were saying ‘You look a little like me,’” she says of series brothers Brandon Quinn, Steve Byers and James Thomas — and parents Treat Williams and Kathy Baker. 

 The series has Carpani as an Internal Affairs detective whose job puts her at odds with her cop-filled family.  She’s smart and strong but makes mistakes and sometimes clutzy moves.  “When I read Abby, I thought, ‘I don’t care how.  This character is hilarious.  I’ve got to play her,’” the actress says. 

Carpani is used to putting in long hours on a series set.  She starred for “six and a half of my formative years” on Australian TV’s “McLeod’s Daughters,” which took place in a cattle station in the outback   Of the differences in productions, she says, “Really, it’s just on a bigger scale here.  The crews are pretty much the same.  A set’s a set.  Getting up at 4 a.m. is getting up at 4 a.m.  ‘McLeod’s Daughters’ was more physically challenging; we were on horseback every day.  Obviously, with ‘Against the Wall’ I do feel a little bit of pressure,” she says of carrying the show.  “But I try not to think about that part, and just do a good job.”

Their reality show set a ratings record for the Style Network, but it sounds as if “Tia & Tamera” might be a little too real for some members of the famous twins’ families.  

 As viewers of the series know, the Mowry sisters have been showing plenty of stress in episodes that have Tia in her last weeks of pregnancy and Tamera as a bride.

 ”Both of the husbands are huge surpporters,” says Tamera, referring to her groom, Fox News correspondent Adam Housley, and Tia’s husband, actor Cory Hardrict.  “Anything that makes their wives happy and successful, they’re going to support.  But I don’t think either of our husbands are going to be doing another season.”  Why not?  “Well, I can’t speak for Cory, but I know my husband is very particular about making sure he keeps his job,” Tamera answers with a laugh.                      

Then she says, “No, I’m sure every now and then, if I needed him, he’d come in and do something.  It’s really too early to say for either of them, whether they’d come back.  I don’t want to put that out there.”  She does say, though, that if there’s a Season 2, she’d like to focus more attention on her and Tia’s work world.

 Then, there’s Tia’s and Tamera’s mom.  “She never agreed to the fact we did a reality show,” Tamera says.  “She’s still kind of… not really…let’s just say she’s adjusting.  You know, it’s one thing to have people judge your work, but seeing that you are putting yourself out there — it’s challenging to have people judge you as a person.  That’s getting too close to home.  You have to learn to ignore the negative things people say.”

In fact, Tamera admits that if she’d known then what she knows now, “I don’t know that I would have done it at the times in our lives when we were both so vulnerable.”

 She sounds wounded when an internet review calling her a “bridezilla” is mentioned.  “Honestly, I don’t think I was a bridezilla.  Look at the bridezilla shows.  I am nothing compared to those.  I never had those moments of screaming at my sister.  I just wanted her there with me.  We love each other, and I was there for her 150 per cent when she had her wedding.  And in return, for the biggest day of my life, she didn’t lift her finger.  I absolutely wanted her there, and when she couldn’t do things, I was frustrated and sad.  But I never thought of myself as being bridezilla-ish or selfish,” says Tamera, who eventually designated her best friend as maid of honor — “a huge, huge issue” — with Tia being deemed matron of honor. 

Still, she insists that the show has brought her and Tia “closer  — so much closer.  It was therapeautic, in a way.  When you’re in the middle of a situation, it’s kind of hard to have empathy for the other person.  But when you’re on the outside, watching, you say, ‘Oh, now I know what she was going through.’  We communicate better because of the show.”

 Now, the dust has settled.  Tamera is infatuated with her new nephew, Cree, and loves their weekly nap time.  Tia will be going back to work on her BET hit series “The Game” next month, and Tamera has just booked a new movie.  She’ll be playing teacher to fellow former Disney Channel juvenile star Kyle Massey — who’ll play a former child star — in “Friendship Day.”  They’re making it for DirecTV beginning Oct. 1.

 For all its difficulties, “Tia & Tamera” deserves credit for showing the sisters working through their differences in a healthy way.  And the matter-of-fact presentation of their racially integrated family and circle of friends is nice.  Tamera sounds uncertain about a Season 2, though.  “We’ll have to take it one step at a time.  “Anything and everything Tia and I do, we have to make sure it’s fun.”

Jean Smart, Victor Garber Hallmark Channel photo

Jean Smart, who’s joining the cast of Kathy Bates’ “Harry’s Law” in the recurring role of a prosecutor — she’ll be seen in the first three episodes of the new season — says she’s also considering taking on a play this fall. 

“It’s not a comedy,” she tells us, though she doesn’t want to go into detail as yet.  She adds, “It’s good to get the chance to flex your stage muscles, and it’s been so long since I did a play.” 

Smart flexed her acting muscles in a whole different way as Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, in tonight’s (8/27) Hallmark Channel Original Movie, “William & Catherine: a Royal Romance.”  She’s glad the charming movie presents a more positive, warm and fun image of Camilla than has historically been the case in the media.  “I think people are coming around to her,” she says.   

Well, at least Jean’s version.

Marilyn and Alan Bergman, Barbra Streisand Film Music Society photo

Songwriting greats Alan and Marilyn Bergman aren’t taking much time to bask in the glow of Barbra Streisand’s widely-praised new “What Matters Most” tribute album of their songs.  They’re  in the midst of working on a new version of “Queen of the Stardust Ballroom.”  The Emmy-winning television movie, about a lonely widow who finds love with a postal worker, was transformed into the Broadway musical (ital.) Ballroom (end ital.) in 1978, with songs by the Bergmans and Billy Goldenberg.  Now it’s being planned as a Broadway vehicle for Tyne Daly, with revamping including, says Alan, “five or six new songs” — “at least,” adds Marilyn — on which they’re collaborating with Marvin Hamlisch.  

 ”We love to work with Marvin.  He’s a great composer and great fun to write with.  He’s funny.  He’s so enthusiastic,” notes Marilyn.

When will the show get going?  “As soon as we’re finished,” says Alan with a laugh.

 The Oscar, Emmy and Grammy award-winning couple, who’ve been contributing to the Great American Songbook for more than 50 years, have also been meeting this week with another favorite collaborator, Michel Legrand.  He flew in from France to discuss a new project. 

And they’re writing songs for a prospective animated film of the children’s book, “Broadway Chicken.”  In case you didn’t guess, according to Alan, “It’s about a chicken who becomes a Broadway star.” 

MEANWHILE:  The Bergmans favorite muse is, of course, Streisand, who recorded dozens of their songs — including such classics as “The Way We Were” and “You Don’t Bring Me Flowers” — before “What Matters Most.”    

The new album contains immortal Bergman tunes that Streisand hasn’t recorded before — like “Windmills of Your Mind” and “Nice ‘n’ Easy.”  They knew nothing of her plans for the record until “it came up in public.  We were at the Motion Picture Academy one night, as part of a little panel discussion that Quincy Jones moderated, that Barbra and Alan and I were doing,” Marilyn recalls.  “She said, suddenly, apropos of I don’t know what — ‘My next album is going to be a tribute to you guys.’”

 It is, says Marilyn, “thrilling and moving.”  And they have a lot to say about Streisand’s treatments of their songs.  For example, her rendition of “Nice ‘n Easy,” which they penned for Frank Sinatra, is “much closer to the way I heard the song in my mind when we wrote it.  I heard it slow, as a ballad,” Marilyn adds.  “I remember being at the Sinatra session.  We were surprised he allowed writers to come.  We were kids, maybe he thought it would be an education.  The first time I heard the arrangement, I thought, ‘Oh!  That’s fast!’  I wasn’t so sure — but it became a classic record. 

“Somebody said that Sinatra sang about falling in love, and Barbra sang about making love,” she continues.  “I think that rings true.  I think his version was kind of a sexy romp, and Barbra’s record is very seductive.” 

Also surprising to the team is Streisand’s take on “Windmills of Your Mind,” which she bravely opens a capella.  She doesn’t need to hide behind orchestrations, points out Alan; “She has a great voice.”  And Marilyn adds, “It’s richer.  Whatever experience you gather in all your years comes through in your voice, and she’s lived.”

Zooey Deschanel Fox photo

Buddy Holly might have been celebrating his 75th birthday Sept. 7, had the iconic rock ‘n’ roll pioneer not lost his life at age 22 in the infamous “day the music died” Iowa plane crash along with Richie Valens and J.P. “The Big Bopper” Richardson.  This year, Holly’s birthday will be celebrated in a huge way, with events including the unveiling of his star on the Hollywood Blvd. Walk of Fame, and the release of “Listen To Me: Buddy Holly” an all-star tribute album that will also serve as the basis of the “Ultimate Buddy Party,” a VIP concert event that will be filmed as a PBS special.

Buddy Holly

Legendary record producer Peter Asher is the man behind “Listen To Me,” and he’ll be on hand to speak at the star unveiling as well as the concert.  He tells us the first performer lined up for the album was Stevie Nicks.  “We asked her very early on, so she got to choose which song she wanted to do.  She grabbed ‘Not Fade Away’ and did a really great job with it.  It’s a really great vocal.’”

Others on the highly-listenable album include Ringo Starr, Brian Wilson, Eric Idle, The Fray, Cobra Starship, Patrick Stump, Jeff Lynne, Natalie Merchant, Imelda May, Lyle Lovett, Jackson Browne, Chris Isaak, Pat Monahan of Train, and Zooey Deschanel.

Stevie Nicks

Asher says, “It was one step at a time.  There are people we thought would be Buddy Holly fans who weren’t necessarily.  Others heard what we were doing and said, ‘I’m in.’”  Zooey — the couldn’t-be-hotter indie rocker-actress who has a new Fox sitcom, “The New Girl” debuting Sept. 20 — was actually the last star aboard the project.  “That was interesting.  We were thinking about ‘It’s So Easy,’” he says of the perennial Holly favorite, “and I’d been a fan of Zooey’s since I first heard She & Him” — her duo.  Then, “I ran into her in my house — at a party my daughter Victoria was giving downstairs,” he says.  Victoria is a member of Cobra Starship.  “I had read that she was a Linda Ronstadt fan, so I knew we had that in common…She committed right away.” 

Ronstadt’s 1976 hit version of Holly’s “That’ll Be the Day” — one of many Ronstadt recordings produced by Asher — is also included on the album.

Peter Asher

“It’s a labor of love for me,” he says of the project, into which he’s put about a year so far.  Holly’s career, he notes, was incredibly prolific and potent despite its stunning bevity.  “Not only did he write this extraordinary catalogue of songs, but he was starting to change things in other ways.  He wanted to start his own label.  That was revolutionary at the time.  He was questioning the structure of  the record business.  He would have changed the whole music business.” 
 Not only that, but “He made glasses cool.  He was the nerdy guy for the nerdy guys among us, like me, to identify with.  My songwriting partner at the time wanted to be Elvis.  I wanted to be Buddy Holly.”

Jane Alexander, Mark Penfold as Queen Elizabeth, Prince Phillip Hallmark Channel photo

Jane Alexander returns to TV Saturday (8/27) in the Hallmark Channel original movie “William & Catherine: A Royal Romance” — adding the role of Queen Elizabeth II to a brilliant roster of real-life characters ranging from Eleanor Roosevelt to Calamity Jane, Hedda Hopper and Georgia O’Keeffe.  The esteemed actress says she wasn’t intimidated by the idea that Her Majesty might see her work in the film.

“No, not really, because she is a public figure, so I’m sure she is used to these kinds of things.  God knows Helen Mirren did a brilliant job in ‘The Queen’ — that started it off.  Who knows if she and Phillip would ever look at movies about the royal family.  Maybe they would out of curiosity, but my hunch is, maybe not.  They know the real Kate.  They know the real William,” she points out.

For Alexander, “A Royal Romance” marked a reunion with filmmaker Linda Yellen, with whom she made the Peabody Award-winning 1980 concentration camp drama “Playing for Time.”  (Alexander’s Supporting Actress Emmy was one of a collection earned by the production, including Outstanding Made for Television Movie.)   She was delighted when Yellen contacted her about the Hallmark Channel film, which tells the William and Kate love story in a unique and fanciful sort of way;  the late Princess Diana is a key character.  As for the Queen, she is seen as a properly grandmotherly figure who has a strong competitive streak and likes an occasional game of Wii tennis.  Such lively details came right out of Yellen’s research, notes Alexander.

“I know so well what the Queen’s face looks like.  I’ve been a fan of hers for so many years.  There is a slight resemblance.  I don’t look the same, but what can one do?  We had a very good makeup artist, and the hair comes close.”

She adds impishly, “Playing the Queen, I found myself very comfortable when people genuflected.  I liked it. I said, ‘Oh yeah, this is good.’”

Production headquartered in Bucharest, Romania, where filming was done in Cotroceni Palace, home of President Traian Basescu.  During the shoot, Prince Charles — the real one — came to call.  “The irony,” says Alexander.  “He was right across the courtyard from us and didn’t even come over to say ‘Hello’ to his good old Mum.”  She laughs.

Victor Garber portrays the prince in the movie, with Jean Smart as Camilla, and Dan Amboyer and newcomer Alice St. Clair as William and Kate.  (Preview clip.)

These days, the former head of the National Endowment for the Arts splits her time between New York and a home in Nova Scotia.  She’s a conservationist, among her many causes, and does surveying work, keeping track of bird species for Canadian Fish and Wildlife.  She also works with the Panthera organization devoted to saving the world’s big cats.

We have to believe Her Majesty would be most pleased with the casting choice.

Camryn Grimes

The paranormal meets photogenic reality TV competition in Zak Bagans’ “Paranormal Challenge” — in which two teams of ghost hunters stay overnight at a purportedly haunted locale to see who can collect the most evidence of supernatural stuff.  Yes, really.  Tomorrow night’s (8/19) show has the ladies of Paranormal Hot Squad squaring off against the Ghost Bros team at Lompoc, California’s La Purisima Mission, site of a bloody 1823 battle between Spanish troops and Chumash tribespeople. 

“We have to sit there in our waiting room, in a pitch black dark lounge.  I was freaking out, I really was,” recalls Camryn Grimes, who guest ghosted with the Paranormal Hot Squad for the night.  “When they said, ‘All right teams.  Are you ready?  Go!’ the fear turns into adrenaline.  I’m very competitive.”

 The pretty 21-year-old actress of “The Young and the Restless” fame, as well as shows such as “NCIS,” has been a fan of paranormal shows for years — but says she’d never had a ghostly experience herself.  She says she went into “Paranormal Challenge” wanting to come out with answers, “saying ‘Yes, this is real,’ or ‘No, this is not real.’” 

Guess which way it went. 

 ”I completely believe — completely,” says Camryn.  Put in charge of equipment, she says she crammed to learn as much as she could about ghost hunting gear as fast as possible.  She brought along “digital cameras, one infrared camera…a thermal imaging camera, two audio recorders…a Mel Meter…”

What’s a Mel Meter?  “That’s sort of the Swiss Army knife of paranormal investigation equipment,” answers Camryn.  She then describes the microprocessor-based hand-held instrument that detects temperature and Electro Magnetic Field changes and such.  She won’t give away what happens, but does say she’s become hooked on paranormal investigation as a result of the Travel Channel show.