Category Archives: Tacky Taste

Beck/Smith Hollywood’s 36th Annual Tacky Taste Awards

Thanksgiving is here — time to remember all the things for which we are truly grateful. And it’s also time for our annual dishing of celebrity turkeys whose behavior you found hard to swallow this year. A big ‘thank you!’ to those who contributed comments and votes. Now, here they are, from the nefarious to the uproarious, with some dizzy ding-dongs in-between, the 2013 Beck/Smith Hollywood Tacky Taste Awards:

1. Miley Cyrus. “Surely Miley Cyrus deserves your tacky award. She has been trying so hard to be tackiest of all, with her twerking, her onstage pot smoking, her naked ‘Wrecking Ball’ video and seemingly more tackiness each and every week.” — miley vmaBenP1600. “Her twerk-a-thon during the MTV Video Music Awards was about as sexy as a dog humping someone’s leg.” — Chris E., Woodland Hills, Calif. “Hannah Montana grew up and became Miley I da ho.” — Katelyn S., Albuquerque, N.M.

2. Justin Bieber, “for his pee-in-a-bucket and diss-Clinton video moments and his truly offensive written statement in the Anne Frank House guest book that he’d like to think Anne would be a ‘Belieber’ if she were alive today.” — Brandon_W

3. The Kardashians. For lots of reasons. Among them, contributor Grace H. of Burbank writes: “Kim Kardashian for refusing a baby gift from Katie Couric because, in her words, ‘I hate fake media friends.'” And then there’s … “Now it’s Kendall Jenner getting into the tacky Kardashian self-exploitation circus with her nipple-baring ‘art photography’ shot at 18, and her half-sister Khloe answers criticism of that by telling the public to ‘enjoy the view’?! No class whatsoever.” — kim 'n' kanyePaula P., Lancaster, Calif. And then there’s … “Kanye West’s ‘Yeezus’ record is full of sleaze and the video with him and baby mama Kim Kardashian, where she is topless, is totally tacky. ‘I wanna $#@! you hard on the sink. After that get you something to drink.’ Really? Now, those are some crappy AND tacky lyrics!” — Jen R., Houston, Texas.

4. Alec Baldwin. “For his anti-gay outburst against a photographer and his homophobic rant on Twitter against a British journalist. And for being a smug punk with an anger management problem.” — Dan G., Spokane, Wash.

5. President Barack Obama/Obamacare. “I can’t believe they farmed out the job of programming the U.S. government’s affordable health care website to CGI Group Inc, a Canadian software company. Surely a good ol’ all-American software company could have #$@!’ed it up just as well.” — B.R., Athens, Ga.

mia and son6. Mia Farrow, “for blabbing to the world that she was still carrying on with Frank Sinatra and had a son by him long after he had remarried.” — Grace H. Burbank, Calif.

7. Chris Brown. “I nominate Chris Brown and the gossip media that still follows around this waste of space of a human being. [He was] thrown out of rehab for violent behavior and smashed the window of your own mother’s car with a brick.  He needs jail.” — TimCCD.

8. This has been a terrible year for scandals among mayors and mayoral wannabes. Collectively, they landed in the Tacky Top 10. “Toronto’s Rob Ford is tackiest. Let us count the ways: He admitted smoking crack cocaine and is said to have imbibed vodka in his car and to have brought suspected prostitutes to his office. But he won’t resign.” — Mary M., Dearborn, Mich. “Your tacky winner is former U.S. Congressman Anthony Weiner, hands down — or should it be pants down? In spite of the scandals over his sending lewd photos of himself to women on Twitter, he still wanted to run for mayor of NYC. This is the level of our leaders these days?” — J.B., White Plains, N.Y. “I nominate San Diego’s sexual harassment king and former mayor, Bob Filner. If false imprisonment and battery against three women, charges to which he recently pled guilty, isn’t the tackiest of all, I can’t imagine what is.” — Phyllidater.

9. Seth MacFarlane, “for bringing down the Academy Awards show to his own coarse, tacky, tasteless level. I grew up on the Oscars as the epitome of class and wit, and unforgettable moments like David Niven’s response when a streaker ran across the stage. To sink to a production number called ‘We Saw Your Boobs’ and an endless run of offensive jokes is truly sad.” — T.M., Dubuque, Iowa

10. Rihanna. “So tacky, the way she can’t keep her hands off her lady parts in concert. Wish she would lay off the dirty girl theatrics and just sing.” — YosiPF. And that’s it for this year! Here’s hoping your turkeys are tasty ones.

COPYRIGHT 2013 MARILYN BECK AND STACY JENEL SMITH DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM

THE 35TH ANNUAL BECK/SMITH HOLLYWOOD TACKY TASTE AWARDS

Happy Thanksgiving to one and all and a big thank you to readers of this column who submitted candidates for Beck/Smith Hollywood’s 35th Annual Tacky Taste Awards! Yes, we received votes for both President Barack Obama and former governor Mitt Romney this election year — but our tackiest Top Ten drew more. There are so many celebrity turkeys this year, we’d better get started before indigestion sets in:

 1. Clint Eastwood. “Clint Eastwood’s endless, embarrassing ad libbed monologue to a chair at the Republican convention should get your tacky prize,” wrote M.C. of San Juan Capistrano, CA. “It was like seeing somebody’s drunken uncle ruin a party,” added LesB1. Or, as Heidi D. of New York put it, “I don’t think ‘Dirty Harry’ made anybody’s day this time.”
2. Joan Rivers. Contributor Grace H. of Burbank, CA proclaimed: “It’s fall and Tackies are crawling out of the woodwork. The silly season is in full swing. Joan Rivers got an early start by making a scene in a Burbank Costco parking lot because Costco refused to carry her nasty book ‘I Hate Everyone Including Me’ which was replete with the F word.”
3. “The Tacky Taste Award should go to: the Petraeus/Broadwell/Kelley/Allen mess or, briefly, ‘Generals Gone Wild'” wrote Robert A. He was part of a late surge in voting that took off earlier this month after David Petraeus stepped down as head of the CIA and admitted his affair with biographer Paula Broadwell — which has led to more revelations involving Florida socialite Jill Kelley and General John Allen. Joked reader Danette S. of New Orleans, “David Petraeus and John Allen: top generals taking orders from their
privates! Soooooo tacky.”
4. Lance Armstrong. Julia C. of Arizona summarized the feelings of many when it comes to the doping-tainted cyclist, who was stripped of his Tour de France titles. “The guy lied and carried on the facade of innocence for years. He was able to control his own team for many of those years to carry on his innocence. He truly is the master of lying publicly and getting us to believe in him — even idolize him. He got sponsors to pay millions to represent their products. Even when the story began crumbling, he had his lies rehearsed so well that he still seemed believable and almost made you feel sorry for him. The guy went to the Arnold Schwarzenegger School of Integrity and needs to hire Tiger’s PR guy.”
5.  Donald Trump.  From John W. of St. Louis:  “The Evil egomaniac with the epoxied comb-over.  Who could be more deserving of a tacky award than Donad Trump.  Ranting that the election was a ‘sham and a travesty’ because he doesn’t like President Obama is typical behavior.”
6. Mary Kate Olson and her 16-years-older love, Olivier Sarkozy, the French banker who is also half brother of the former French president, Nicolas. Declared Grace.tra, “The pictures are revolting. She’s like a smoking Muppet on an outing with him and his (same height) daughter.” Echoed Arlene L. of Cedar Rapids, IA: “Tres tacky.”
7. Lindsay Lohan. “Substance abusing, jewelry grabbing, vehicularly impaired lowlife Lindsay Lohan playing immortal Hollywood icon Elizabeth Taylor? What are they thinking? Lifetime gets my vote for their tacky casting choice.” — Shawn2002 in San Francisco.
8. Kristen Stewart. Roxieund1 was among those critical of the “Twilight” leading lady: “It isn’t that she cheated on Robert Pattinson that makes her so tacky. It’s her acting, which consists of one expression: constipated.”
9. The Media. Among complaints about biased news people and maniacal gossip hounds this election year were comments regarding the media circus surrounding Whitney Houston’s death. “It was the height of ghoulishness, when even CNN was advertising a ‘stake-out camera’ at the funeral home,” griped Atlanta-based Jbstcher.
10. Ann Coulter. Pam E. of New Haven, CT, was among those who feel, “Ann Coulter is tackiest this year and every year. She will say anything to get attention. Attacking the late Princess Diana (‘just this anorexic bulimic narcissist’) and using the word ‘retard’ for the President and then refusing to apologize for the slur are two examples of her ugly modus operandi.”
And that’s it for this year! Here’s hoping all your turkeys have the best of taste.

Nicollette Sheridan: Bad Enough to Make Use of Day in Court?

Nicollette Sheridan as Edie Britt

There was a time when Nicollette Sheridan’s court battle against “Desperate Housewives” creator Marc Cherry and ABC would have meant career suicide.  The blond bombshell has branded herself as a troublemaker.  She’s shown an edgy, prickly side on the witness stand.  She’s invited scrutiny from the public and the media — the kind of scrutiny that involves repeated references to her 48 years of age and to her career having faded before being revitalized in 2004 by her “Desperate Housewives” role of Edie Britt.

Yes, there was a time we would have expected her to be expelled by the industry over this fight — relegated to the dinner theater circuit like Suzanne Somers when she fell from network grace after tiffing with “Three’s Company” over her demand for a 500 per cent pay raise and a piece of the show decades ago.  There would be no win for Sheridan’s career, whether or not she wins some or all of the $20 million she’s aiming to get following her claims of assault against Cherry and subsequent wrongful termination.  (Cherry’s jovial quips eliciting laughter from the jury this week — not a good sign.)

However, this is 2012, when good things happen to bad boys and girls.  Charlie Sheen’s wanton carryings on, his beating up of women, his drug use, his arrests, his widely-booed Violent Torpedo of Truth stage show and all his internet strangeness got him a much-anticipated new FX TV series, “Anger Management.”  Recent morgue worker Lindsay Lohan’s “Saturday Night Live” guest-hosting stint last weekend garnered the show its second highest ratings of the season.  Also in the news is “Jersey Shore” low-life Snooki, famous for stumbling around intoxicated in public and so forth; as reports of her pregnancy swirl through the media, she sports a half-million-dollar engagement ring.

Nicollette, in fact, might not be bad enough.  She’s going to need to step up her game and do more than show exasperation.  She did slap her attorney, but only as a demonstration of what she says Cherry did to her.  Maybe she should slap him for real, and get rid of those sedate dark courtroom clothes.  Show cleavage.  Show disrespect.  Show up drunk.  Have a wardrobe malfunction on the courthouse  steps.  Take a tip from Lindsay, who cleverly painted “f— you” on one of her fingernails knowing the cameras followed her every move as a defendant.  It might not be too late for a “Mark Cherry Sucks” tattoo in an eye-catching spot, for example.

If Nicollette and/or her handlers are clever enough to use all this attention to burnish her brand as a still-hot-looking diva cougar, maybe it could actually help her career.  Maybe there will be a new show in it for her.  At the very least, surely Donald Trump would save a seat for her in his “Celebrity Apprentice” board room.

The 34th Tacky Taste Awards Top 10 Winners!

 Happy Thanksgiving to all, and a special thank-you to the readers who joined in with their votes and comments for our 34th Annual Tacky Taste Awards.  In a year when some of the biggest scandals in the news — from Penn State to politics — took place outside the Hollywood realm, there’s still a banquet of show business celebrity turkeys to chew on.  And heeeeere they are.

1.  Kim Kardashian & Family.  Riled up over Kim’s 72-day marriage to NBA player Kris Humphries, readers voted to bestow 1st Place, Tackiest Celebrities of the Year dishonors on the Kardashian clan.  Among the comments:

“KarTRA$Hian is KarKA$Hingin — the fake marriage down to the crappy clothes at Sears.” — Hannah L., New York, NY  

“She went from saying Kris was so nice and down to earth to saying he was only in it to climb the fame ladder practically overnight.  Of course people are suspicious. She made more than $17 million from the wedding.” — Pam R.,Canton, OH. 

“Kim Kardashian was made for your Tacky Taste Award.” — Nathan P., San Francisco, CA

Steve M. from Dallas, TX had a different take: “I think all the dimwits who watch the Kardashian family and then complain about them deserve a Tacky award.  Idiots, change the channel!”

2.  Chuck Lorre and Charlie Sheen  So many voters mentioned the “Two and a Half Men” creator and his former star together, it seemed appropriate to reunite them just this one last time in the annals of Tacky Taste.  For example: 

From Julia in AZ:  “Charlie Sheen’s year of tirades, drugs and hookers and Chuck Lorre’s repeated endcaps and on-air rebuttles have really done it for me.  I thought by now the banter would be over and bringing in Ashton would let the show stand on its own, but Chuck doesn’t seem to want to let go.  Week after week they have to rehash all of Charlie’s downfalls.  Come on, kill the show now if you are going to make it a year of Charlie-channeling.  Even Charlie seems to have learned to shut his mouth.” 

G.M. in Santa Monica, CA wrote, “Not that I’m buying Charlie Sheen’s good behavior act, but Chuck Lorre needs to get over being bitter and stop sniping at Charlie and try to improve the show, which sucks now.”  

In the opinion of witty Bernice R. of Naples, FL, “It has been a close race this year for the Tacky Taste Award.  Charlie Sheen was the star of the pack early on, but his admitting to his foolish rages took the edge off criticizing him.  Darn.  But then when all seemed lost, Kim Kardashian came along with her whirlwind romance, brain-free husband, check cashing acrobatics and surprise (not) divorce, and challenged Charlie for the lead.  I’ve got it!  How about a Tacky Couple Award? Theirs would be a match made in Hollywood heaven.  Oh, those two have got to meet, or what’s a Hollywood for?” 

3.  Arnold Schwarzenegger.  Grace H. of Burbank sums it up:  “Former governator Arnold Schwarzenneger makes Bill Clinton look like a cub scout.  First he let Maria find out the hard way that he sired a child by his housekeeper.  Then after they split up he went out in public sporting a T shirt that said, “I survived Maria 1977 – 2010.” 

And this comment from reader Linda D.:  “Arnold Schwarzenegger deserves the award for being unfaithful to his wife, family, and the state of California.  And then having the bad taste to wear an ‘I survived Maria’ t-shirt.” 

Agrees Paula G.: “It has to be the Arnold:  what he has done to Maria Shriver is so awful.  I used to like him, but now, I am not interested in seeing anything he does.  Thank goodness he’s no longer the Governor of California.” 

4.  Gerard Depardieu.  “Gerard Depardieu deserves your award, hands down, for urinating in the aisle of a plane after being told he had to wait until after takeoff to use the bathroom, causing a two-hour flight delay.  If one of us mere mortals did that, we’d be arrested.” — Ken, Tacoma, WA. 

Peggy S. of Los Angeles voted for Depardieu, adding, “I want to mention Anderson Cooper also.  It was one thing to get the giggles during his report about l’affaire Depardeiu — but then to have Depardieu on his talk show to discuss the incident, and hand out peepee bottles to everyone in the audience?  That was Tacky.  But I still love Anderson.”  

5.  Lindsay Lohan.  The troubled actress, who has been doing community service at the L.A. morgue as a result of violating her probation, drew tacky votes for “blowing chance after chance to straighten out,” as J.Y. of Bell, CA put it. 

“Lindsay Lohan gets my vote.  You know you’ve hit bottom when Heidi Fleiss gets on TV and congratulates you for posing for Playboy and says you’d make a great hooker.” — Tara K., Ohio

6.  Kate Gosselin.  “As always, the tackiest person in America is Kate Gosselin,” contends Dee W.  She explains: “From her trashy clothing to her constant bashing of the father of her children, she epitomizes the word tacky.  Her classifiying her ex as ‘mediocre’ because he prefers to work a regular job and live out of the spotlight was classic Kate.” 

“I would rather listen to nails on a chalkboard than that whiney b#@! any day.” — George F., Woodland Hills, CA

7.  Jesse James.  The reality show star got a late flurry of votes after his ex, Kat Von D, went public with her claim that he’d cheated on her with at least 19 women during their engagement.  “Wasn’t he supposed to have been treated for sex addiction after his cheating wrecked his marriage to Sandra Bullock?  Jesse, you tacky dog, you should demand your money back.” — L.Z.

8.  Courteney Cox and David Arquette.  “Their over-sharing about their sex life problems on Howard Stern’s show has tainted my feelings about them.   Really, Courteney, thought you had more class than to dispense such intimate details with gutter language.  Sad for Coco.” — Linda W., Peoria, IL

9.  Hank Williams, Jr., ESPN and “Fox and Friends.”  The singer’s remark, on “Fox and Friends,” making an analogy using President Obama and Hitler, got his iconic theme song cut from Monday Night Football after 20 years — and both sides chimed in: 

`”Hank totally got the shaft.  If you read the transcript, he never said Obama was like Hitler.  His conservative politics is what really got him ousted from MNF.  And he’s right that ‘Fox and Friends’ set him up.” — Dan H. 

On the other hand, S.B. of Long Island, NY, wrote, “Who gives a damn what Hank Williams Jr. thinks?  He’s a right-wing crackpot with no talent.  Glad to see him go.” 

10.  Brad Pitt.  “Some people continue to add insult to dumping their spouses overboard.  Brad Pitt told Dotson Rader of Parade Magazine that his life was boring when he was married to Jennifer Aniston.  Quote, “I wasn’t living an interesting life, myself.  I think that my marriage [to Jennifer Aniston] had something to do with it.”  – Grace H., Burbank, CA

BeckSmith Hollywood’s Annual Tacky Taste Awards Voting is On for 2011!

Nicole Polizzi, better known as Snooki, Tacky Taste Award Winner 2010. Who will win this year?

 Sure, you’re thinking trick or treat, but the fact is, it’s less than a month now until Thanksgiving, which means it’s time for our annual roasting of celebrities who’ve exhibited the tackiest taste this year.   Readers decide this, you may recall, not us.   How far we have come from this contests’s beginnings, when a simple extramarital affair or wardrobe malfunction could be enough to land the prize.  With tacky reality notoriety a way of life, show business celebrities have to work extra hard to out-tacky one another now.  And yet, they do.  So what do you think?  Will Snooki win again?  Or does Susan Sarandon have a chance for calling the pope a Nazi?  Or Hank Williams, Jr., for comparing the President to Hitler?  Or maybe the Kardashians will inspire Kontempt through their Klothes.  Who knows?   Tell us who’s your choice for Tackiest celeb and be sure to include why.  Send emails marked Tacky Taste to Stacy@becksmithhollywood.com.  The results will be posted Thanksgiving week.