Category Archives: Tacky Taste

BECK/SMITH HOLLYWOOD’S 33RD ANNUAL TACKY TASTE AWARDS

Snooki

Happy Thanksgiving to one and all, and a big serving of gratitude to the readers who contributed their votes — and wit — to this annual celebrity turkey shoot. Our cornucopia overflows with tackiness, so let’s get to it:

1. Snooki. Just in time for her 23rd birthday this week (Nov. 23), the petite “Jersey Shore” vixen becomes the top vote getter in the 33rd Annual Beck/Smith Hollywood Tacky Taste Awards. Yes, Snooki, nee Nicole Polizzi, won the hearts — or at least, the attention — of Tacky voters across the land.

“Cute little figure and dumb as a box of rocks. Snooki is my Tacky Princess for 2010,” writes R.M. of Anaheim, CA. “Snooki and ‘Tacky’ go together like Cheetohs and orange fingers. Ya gotta love her,” says Jamie L. of Canton, OH. Referring to her arrest this past summer for loudly stumbling around drunk on a beach, Teri99 points out: “When a judge calls you a ‘Lindsay Lohan wannabe’ it just doesn’t get tackier than that.” Carlos G. of New York brought up Snooki’s surprising “Happy Birthday” Twitter exchange with John McCain: “Look out. This is how it all began with Sarah Palin.”

2. Lady Gaga. “Lady Ga-ga’s dress con carne pushed her into the gag-o-sphere of tackiness” as reader Bernice R. of Naples, FL cleverly puts it. She adds, “I propose a last name for her: ‘Maggot.’ Then, she could be called, ‘Lady Gag-a-Maggot.’ Grace H. of Burbank, CA, concurs: “She seems to be the figment of a deranged mind. She really went too far when she was dressed in slabs of meat. Now that Mr. Blackwell is gone women will do anything.”

Kate Gosselin

3. Kate Gosselin. “She claims to ‘do it all for the kids’ but goes around dressed like a $2 whore and never misses an opportunity to denigrate and bash her ex-husband,” says reader Dee W.. Tell us how you really feel, Dee! She continues that Gosselin “treats other people as if they are less than human, including her own children. This not only is bad for the children, it’s now showing up in the kids’ behavior as well, with 2 of them being expelled from kindergarten (!!) for bullying and mistreating their fellow students.”

4. ‘DWTS’/Bristol Palin. “The politicizing of ‘Dancing With the Stars,’ their fawning over Sarah Palin, and all the Tea Partiers voting to keep the clearly

Bristol Palin and Mark Ballas ABC photo

inferior Bristol in the competition all these weeks, has ruined the show for me. I won’t be watching any more,” proclaims Joanne R. of West Haven, CT. Others, like brucekn write, “It’s ‘Dancing With the Stars.’ Since when is Bristol Palin a star?”

5. Mel Gibson/Oksana Grigorieva. “I certainly don’t condone Gibson’s terrible behavior, what with the racist rants, the verbal abuse and threats he’s heaped on Oksana, and the fact he left his wife for this nasty woman. However, I feel sorry for him because he is obviously mentally ill and she took advantage of

Mel Gibson

that to trap and extort him. The whole situation is beyond tacky,” writes TrulyJenC. Her sentiments are echoed by Rory from Atlanta: “All she cares about is $$. These tapes exploit his bipolar disease. Stop posting them!” But others are less sympathetic to the rage-spewing star. Tim G. of Northridge, CA, blasts, “Set up or not, Gibson is an abuser, pure and simple. His claim of being ‘broke’ is funny. I thought he had a $900 million fortune not so long ago. So, now he’s down to $300 million and feeling the pinch? I should be so broke.”

6. David Arquette, for “going on Howard Stern’s show after the announcement of his marital split from Courteney Cox and airing all their dirty laundry? Announcing his having sex with another woman? Ugh. I wonder how Courteney stayed with this idiot for so long,” wrote Rochelle T. of St. Louis.

7. Charlie Sheen. “I don’t know which is worse: Sheen or his Hollywood enablers. He tears up a NYC hotel room and clocks a hooker and they say it’s an allergic reaction?! As long as the checks are good, right folks?” — Rich M., Newark, NJ

8. The Kardashians. The celebutante/socialite sisters Kourtney, Kim, and Khloe seen on “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” drew tacky votes for various reasons. “Kim flaunting her sexual relationship with Miles Austin in front of ex Reggie Bush shows again she’s a total skank” — Tenney, Brooklyn, NY. “Khloe’s ongoing comments about finding it hard to conceive with Lamar Odom are tacky T.M.I.” — Brenda K., San Diego, CA. “I still don’t get what these three sleazy man-eating @#!$es are famous for.” — Pat O., El Paso, TX

9. Joaquin Phoenix. Clearly, Casey Affleck’s “I’m Still Here: The Lost Year of Joaquin Phoenix” hoax was a dud. Bernice R. skewers Joaquin thusly: “Wacky jokester but otherwise talented, Joaquin Phoenix’s nauseating hair and beard garnered him literally tens of fans worldwide this year, bringing the total attendance to his last movie to 72 virgins, but only if you count the enamored camels.” Ouch.

10. Laura Schlessinger. A past Tacky Taste winner returns, with complaints over her tackiness summed up by G.H.: “Laura Schlessinger used the ‘N’ word repeatedly as she was talking to a caller who was black.”

Dishonorable Mentions. They’re not celebrities, but many would agree with Michael B. of Rockford, Il, when he says “The brain trust at the Transportation Security Agency who came up with the virtual strip search and sexually invasive pat downs to which travelers are suddenly being subjected are tackiest of all this year.” Then there’s “Stephen Colbert’s appearance before the Senate hearings on migrant workers. [It] will stand forever in the annals of tackiness, otherwise known as the Congressional Record. Single-handedly, Colbert elevated a government committee up to the level of cheap entertainment. Kudos also go to Jon Stewart for calling the President of the United States, ‘Dude,’ to his face.” — B.R., FL

And that’s it for this year. Here’s hoping all your turkeys offer the very best of taste.

Beck/Smith Hollywood Tacky Taste Awards 2009

Happy Thanksgiving to one and all and a big thank you to readers of this column who submitted candidates for this year’s Tacky Taste Awards.  From lofty heights to lowlifes, cheesy reality TV stars to the Nobel Prize Committee – 2009 marks possibly the most wide-ranging menu of celebrity bad taste we’ve seen in the history of this contest!   So let’s get to it:

Jon Gosselin

Jon Gosselin

1.  Jon & Kate Gosselin.  The couple who rose to fame as the parents of cute twins and sextuplets – and gained infamy with their bitter split, their affairs, their ugly accusations, oversized egos, etc. were deemed tackiest by a clear majority.  As longtime reader B.B. Richmond of Naples, Florida Fla. put it:  “There could not be a Tacky Taste Award without mentioning Jon and Kate, the All-American loonies. Where did Jon and Kate get the ‘great’ idea to pimp out their kids?  ACORN?  I can envision ACORN advising them. ‘Don’t call it “child abuse,” call it a “Reality TV Show.”’ Hopefully the kids will earn enough money to pay for the best mental help money can buy.” 

Kate Gosselin

Kate Gosselin

Other readers echoed her sentiments:  “The Gosselins should win in tandem,” said Carma, adding, “It’s like they had a tacky-thon to see who could embarrass themselves more.  At least Jon shows some regret for his behavior, she never apologizes for being a ‘B’ from hell!”  Diana wrote: “Kate Gosselin, for so very many things, but mostly for going on national TV and crying about how she can’t afford to feed her children in one breath, then in the next bragging about the diamond and ‘mother of pearl’ she’s going to buy (she clearly does not know what mother of pearl is).

joe-jackson2.  Joe Jackson.  “Joe Jackson is your walking definition of tackiness.  What could be tackier than trying to hype his new record label on the red carpet of an awards show right after Michael’s death?” asked Greg B. of Canoga Park, CA.  Savannah wrote that Jackson’s attitude seems to be: “Just because everyone knows I abused Michael doesn’t mean I’m not gonna contest the will!” 

Kanye West

Kanye West

3.  “Mr. Bad Attitude Kanye West, for spoiling Taylor Swift’s award moment,” as reader Margo P. put it, speaking of West jumping onstage and interrupting Swift’s acceptance speech to say that Beyonce deserved the award.  And from Jed:  “Kanye West deserves a big a** kicking for his VMA stunt.”

 

Carrie Prejean

Carrie Prejean

4.  Dethroned Miss California Carrie Prejean.  From Jeff:  “Carrie Prejean takes the cake!  Skanky hypocrite with her holier than thou attitude, her fake boobs and her sex tape of her masturbating. Now the religious right is cutting ties with her. No one else comes close to this tackiness.”  Morgan P. of Cleveland found the humor:  “What a hoot!  She’s ready to walk off Larry King’s show over ‘inappropriate’ questions?  Larry King, the scary hard-hitting inquisitor.”

David Lettermn

David Lettermn

5.  David Letterman.  “Ughhhh,” wrote Judy O.  “I can’t watch him anymore, thinking of him doing the dirty old man number with his female staff.” “What a nauseating man.  Never liked his mean humor, so I’m glad he’s now getting some turn-about from other comics,” said M.M.

 

Miley Cyrus

Miley Cyrus

 

6.  Miley Cyrus and her daddy, Billy Ray:  “Look at her tacky clothes.  She’s turning up the skank quotient!” wrote D. Lewis of New York.  “Last year it was the bedroom magazine pic, this year pole dancing on the Teen Choice Awards” – Carol.  “…And then come the comments from her father that it’s really okay, people are reading things into that aren’t there.  Riiiiight” – J. Horwitz, Newark, N.J. 

Levi Johnston

Levi Johnston

7.  Levi Johnston, the spotlight-loving father of Sarah Palin’s grandson, and ex-boyfriend of Bristol Palin:  From Patty W.: “Levi Johnston deserves to be named Tackiest. Also Vanity Fair and Playgirl and all the media rushing to help him embarrass Sarah Palin for fun and profit.”

 

Martin Scorsese

Martin Scorsese

 

8.  The Roman Polanski Defenders.  Contributor B.B. Richmond again summed up the feelings of others who expressed disgust toward those advocating in favor of director Roman Polanski’s release, more than three decades after being charged with rape and pleading guilty to unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor.  “It was treated like a ‘minor infraction’ by Hollywood beacons of morality Martin Scorsese, Woody Allen, David Lynch, Jonathan Demme and Pedro Almodovar who signed a petition to demand Polanski’s release from jail on a morals crime.  Earth to those lights, so lofty that they are out of touch:  I will tell you the same thing that Sister Mary Ann taught in fifth grade, ‘Show me your friends and I will tell you what you are.’” 

Perez Hilton

Perez Hilton

9.  Perez Hilton.  The self-proclaimed most hated Hollywood blogger on the internet drew some hate from our readers, too, for several of his exploits this year, including his feud with the Black Eyed Peas’ Will.i.am.  “I am voting for Perez Hilton (who’s famous for what again?) for saying he’d been attacked by Will.i.am when it was clearly his manager,” wrote Isaac. 

Michael Lohan

Michael Lohan

10.   Michael Lohan:  Lindsay’s father got Tacky Awards attention for releasing  embarrassing and damning tapes about his troubled daughter.  “This man has no conscience.” – L. Ramirez, Albuquerque, N.M.

 DISHONORABLE MENTIONS go to Sammy Sosa for “looking whiter and brighter” – M.P; Sarah Palin for reasons including “her endless whining” – Tracey W; Glenn Beck, for “fear-mongering that goes beyond tacky” – D.L.; and the Nobel Prize Committee, for giving President Obama the Nobel Peace Price “for doing nothing.  It sort of cheapens the prize they gave Yasser Arafat, don‘t you think?” – B.R.

That’s it for this year.  From now on, may all your turkeys be tasty ones

Beck/Smith Hollywood Tacky Taste Awards 2008

Sarah Palin

Sarah Palin

With Thanksgiving almost upon us again, it’s time to dish those celebrity turkeys whose behavior you found hard to swallow this year — the 2008 Tacky Taste Awards, voted on by readers. Here are the Top 10 results:

1. Sarah Palin. The former VP candidate may not have won on Nov. 4, but she won here, proving a lightning rod for tacky votes — with correspondence both condemning and defending her. “I have a big problem with Sarah Palin’s $150,000 wardrobe. So much for being for the working class,” wrote AlleeC via email. Grace H. of Burbank, Calif., wrote, “I second the nomination for Sarah Palin’s wardrobe and everything else Sarah Palin — such as her look-at-me-I’m-pregnant-and-single teenage daughter.”

But on the other hand, after we indicated in our column that the Alaska governor was drawing Tacky votes, a storm of letters came in on her behalf. Such as: “I think you two should be listed as tacky. How many times do you have to be told that Gov. Sarah Palin did not pick out the clothing, it was the RNC. She couldn’t move without the news media and photographers being on her trail, and yet how many photos did we see showing her in the exclusive stores?” wrote Martha J. of Chattanooga, Tenn. “What about the cost of Joe Biden’s botox and hair transplants?” mused Blake123 from the Internet. And then there were those, like KrisL of San Bernardino, Calif., who were disgusted by the triviality of it all: “Forget the economy, Iraq, global warming and health care. Let’s talk about her clothes! Now, that’s tacky.”

2. Madonna and Guy Ritchie. The ugly Madonna/Guy Ritchie divorce and how public they have been about dissing each other got readers’ attention. “He said she was like cuddling up to a piece of gristle, and at a concert she said her song ‘Miles Away’ was dedicated to the emotionally retarded, which people believed she was talking about him. Maybe they’re each right, but why to they have to go out and tell the world? After all, they picked each other,” wrote F.F. of Raleigh, N.C. PandagirlDeb emailed, “Divorce really sucks for the kids, and all the sniping in public doesn’t help.” “Her affair with Alex Rodriguez adds another tacky chapter to her slutty, tacky life story,” said Tony from Phoenix, Ariz.

3. Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. Angelina Jolie’s comment to the New York Times alluding to the fact that she and Brad Pitt fell in love while making “Mr. & Mrs. Smith” rankled more than a few. “So now the truth pops out. Whatever happened to her holier-than-thou statements that her mom was cheated on, so she’d never break up a marriage?” asked reader Jon S.

 

from Bloomfield, N.J. Sean-D emailed, “Why do people always rush to attack Jolie as if she was the sole culprit in this story, with Pitt getting a free pass? It ain’t right.” And then there are those who are just tired of the couple in general. As G.H. of Burbank put it, “I’m sick of Brangelina having kids every time they turn around and reading about them every time they go to the toilet.” 

4. Miley Cyrus and Billy Ray Cyrus. You didn’t forget her bare-in-bed Lolita-esque Vanity Fair pose. “Her daddy is to blame,” declared Ellen of Orlando, Fla. D.G. of Denver felt, “The whole thing with the two of them posing more like a couple than father and daughter was ewwwwwww, sleazy & tacky!! It’s sickening, the way he’s riding her coattails to refresh his career, at any cost.” “I used to really like her, but now I can’t stand her and her huge ego. Go Selena and Demi!” added SamanthaHC on the Internet.

5. Balthazar Getty and Sienna Miller. “What were they thinking, making out with her nearly nude on a beach with paparazzi around? Not only was he married, he’s got four kids. It doesn’t get any tackier,” claimed Ann S., over the Internet. “She acts like a slut and then sues paparazzi over the fact she is a tramp. Sad.” — Dale C., Las Vegas. “Wowza. She doesn’t seem to like wearing tops. She must get a lot of chest colds.” — A.I., Newark

6. Mariah Carey. “Reading about her demanding a private jet, a $15,000 a night penthouse suite and a Michelin-starred chef to appear on the World Music Awards made my blood boil. This kind of outrageous diva behavior was bad enough before, but now that so many people are suffering economically, losing their jobs, unable to pay for their kids’ needs, it’s completely disgusting.” — Nora B., St. Louis, Mo.

7. Lynn Spears. “To exploit your daughter’s personal life to sell your book is beyond tacky. And it’s supposed to be ‘inspirational’ on top of that.” — Bernice, Yonkers, N.Y.

8. Russell Brand, for making fun of the Jonas Brothers’ chastity promise rings on the Video Music Awards. “Even Paris Hilton thought he went too far.” — C.S., Denver

9. Lindsay Lohan. “She is so trashy and tacky, and this incident with her fighting and screaming obscenities at her girlfriend, Samantha Ronson, in a London nightclub is par for the course. Anger management rehab?” — Jay M., Northridge, Calif.

10. John Mayer. “Even though John Mayer and Jennifer Aniston got back together, I thought it was tacky how he kept talking to the press about their breakup. I can’t believe she took him back after that!” — E.F., via email.

And, that’s it for this year. Wishing you all a warm and peaceful holiday, and may all your turkeys be tasty ones!

With reports by Emily Feimster.

To find out more about Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith and read their past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 MARILYN BECK AND STACY JENEL SMITH

DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.

Beck/Smith Hollywood’s Tacky Taste Awards 2007 — 30TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION

Britney Spears

Britney Spears

After three decades of tallying up votes that have run the gamut of celebrity strangeness and bad taste, we have to say, 2007 goes down among the tackiest — at least. The competition was tremendous, we’re sorry to say. Here are the Top 10 stars deemed tackiest of 2007 by readers:

1. BRITNEY SPEARS — “She parties the night away, she loses custody of her kids, has drug test problems, crushes a guy’s feet with her car, runs red lights with kids in backseat, and looks like a sausage packed into a bikini on the VMAs, where she forgets to sing. She’s way beyond tacky,” wrote Chris C. of Van Nuys, CA. Maura H. of Cleveland was among the many who said they were sorry for Spears’ two young sons with ex-husband Kevin Federline: “If she can’t even take care of herself, how can she take care of them?” Said Jordan F. of Arlington, VA, “Tackiest? I recommend the judge who decided to take Britney’s kids from her and give them to Kevin, who’s just as messed-up.” Dylan D. of New York suggested “maybe Brad and Angelina will adopt her kids.” “It was supposed to be her big comeback, but Britney let down tons of fans with her lethargic performance at the VMA’s,” noted F.F. from South Carolina, “and let’s not forget that earlier this year, she also went into a salon and shaved her own hair off. Now, that’s tacky!”

2. SARAH SILVERMAN — “Give your Tacky award to Sarah Silverman, who has worked so hard for it!” urged Jake G., Pasadena, CA. Wrote Shari M. of Bloomfield, N.J.: “She’s dirty, nasty… a perfect example of how sleazy things have gotten on TV nowadays, like her jokes about Paris Hilton on the MTV Awards — they’re going to paint the bars of her jail cell to look like penises so she’ll be more comfortable? If that’s not tacky, what is?” “Taking swipes at Britney, no problem, but when she called Brit’s children “the most adorable little mistakes ever” on an awards show, she was way out of line! Just nasty and tacky! — Foxy C., Los Angeles, CA

3. VANESSA HUDGENS — “She’s supposed to be a role model to young kids everywhere. She had no business posing nude in photos for her boyfriend Zac — wait, I mean, ex-boyfriend Drake Bell. Wait, was it both? So hard to keep track of naked pictures, you know,” said CompuServe reader Uneak1.

4. ROSIE O’DONNELL — “I still can’t believe the on-air fight with Elizabeth Hasselbeck…I used to be a fan of Rosie, but her inflammatory rhetoric, her feuds, her conspiracy theory nonsense — she’s gone from being terrific to terribly tacky,” wrote DPix of Bakersfield, CA. Paul V. opined via the internet, “She’s a bully, she’s rude, she’s vulgar, she believes her s— don’t stink. She is tacky to the tenth power.”

5. PARIS HILTON — PceCollgrrrl wrote on the internet: “The tackiest part of the time she spent in jail was the enormous media frenzy that ensued. We didn’t need to see a one-hour special of Paris, post-jail reading her journal entries during her experience. She broke the law. She deserved to be punished, not applauded for being “brave.”

6. ALEC BALDWIN — “His out-of-control rant against his young daughter was beyond tacky. It was abusive,” complained Leslie S. of Sherman Oaks, CA Internet writer TmW2 is among those who feel that Baldwin ought to “split the tackiness award for bad celebrity father of the year with DAVID HASSELHOFF, who destroyed his image for me forever in that video where he’s drunk and hurling expletives at his teen daughter.”

7. ELLEN DEGENERES — “We love Ellen, but it was a bit much seeing her sobbing on TV over the fact that she broke some doggy adoption rules, which resulted in the adopted dog being taken back by the agency,” barked Val V. of Chattanooga, TN. “The war in Iraq, global warming, worldwide abuse against women, children killing children in schools — and Ellen breaks down over a dog she didn’t even keep for herself? Tacky set of priorities if you ask me.” — M.S. Burbank, CA.

8. DENISE RICHARDS VS. CHARLIE SHEEN — “I don’t know whether her accusations about all his sexual perversions are true or not, but I do know that both these two are putting their vicious divorce battle ahead of the welfare of their children by making such public declarations against each other. Shame on them!” wrote Kelly O. online. “Charlie Sheen announcing to the world that his ex still wants to have children with him — whether true or not — while he’s engaged to another woman proved that Sheen is tactless, shameless and clueless.” — Naomi S., Sacramento, CA

9. LINDSAY LOHAN — “Every time I think Lindsay’s going to get it together, some new story comes out — like her chasing after her assistant’s mother in her car. Pretty tacky,” wrote Shannon B. of Phoenix. Added R.H. of Houston, “After getting in trouble with the law for a DUI, she went to rehab to get help, fine. Then she ended up starting a relationship with a fellow rehabber, who was in a serious relationship at the time. Not just tacky — skanky.”

10. PAULA ABDUL — “Everything about her reality show, ‘Hey Paula,’ was tacky,” said Manuela G. of the Bronx, NY, “from her erratic behavior to her public meltdowns.”

DISHONORABLE MENTIONS: O.J. Simpson for his memorabilia robbing incident, Michael Vick for his apparent participation in dog-fighting, “The Hills” Lauren Conrad due to her sex tape scandal, Dog the Bounty Hunter for using the N-word, Nick Hogan (son of Hunk Hogan) for his street racing that finally resulted in a serious car wreck that left his best friend in a coma, Keifer Sutherland for his DUI arrest, Tim McGraw’s crotch-grabbing fans, and “you, Beck/Smith, for giving all this attention to tacky celebrities.”

Happy Holidays to you all, and may your turkeys be tasty ones!