Dyan Cannon’s Dear Cary memoir, covering her life as the 33 years-younger wife of screen legend Cary Grant, has only been out since Sept. 20, and it’s not only landed at No. 17 on the NY Times Best Seller list of hardcover nonfiction, it’s also elicited interest from — where else? — Hollywood.
“We’ve had nibbles for television, but I will not let it be made for TV,” says the actress, who tells us she spent 25 years thinking about writing the book, and six actually penning it. Given her late ex-husband’s place in the firmament of big screen immortals, she won’t consider even cable TV, she insists. “We have heard from [cable]. No, I’m not going to go there.”
Dyan has been questioned at length about her depiction in the book of Grant pushing her to use and love LSD as he did. And she’s been asked about the persistent rumors about his sexuality. She must have seen it all coming when she agreed to a book tour, correct?
“No. I didn’t know they were going to ask me that question,” replies Dyan, speaking of the “Today” show’s Ann Curry broaching the talk of Grant being bisexual or gay. “Of course I was prepared for it. I write about it in the book. I never saw any evidence to make me think that might be so. We were too busy mmm mmm mmm,” as she puts it.
As far as the “mind-expanding” hallucinogenic drug of which Grant was an open proponent, Dyan considers her terrible experience (that ended in hospitalization) an object lesson. “If you have to go against something you know intrinsically is wrong for you in order to keep a relationship, there’s something wrong with the relationship….I was a baby. I didn’t understand. I just wanted to make him happy.”
Dyan is soon to head to the U.K. on the next leg of her book tour, returning to the land of Grant’s sad childhood. If response there mirrors what she’s experienced Stateside so far, she’ll be thrilled.
“People have told me that it’s life-changing,” she says with a tone of surprise. “People have said that they’re looking at relationships differently. So many are afraid to love again if they get their hearts broken.” She also says, “I really wrestled with what to put in and what to take out, and I wanted to write a book that was helpful. My goal was just to make sure that the love for Cary wasn’t dampened by anything I went through.”